My favorite walking path... and seemingly everything else in life... keeps changing.
This path has been a place of solace for me. The tall trees and wild brambles reminded me that there's beauty in this world, even as I saw them through tear-blurred vision as I tried to adjust to a world without my husband.
But "progress" seems to have struck this place and the hedge of wild bushes that gave a sense of privacy and remoteness to my grief-filled walks are gone.
Lately, I've been wondering if anything will stop changing. Life feels like water dripping through my fingers. The tighter my hood, the faster it squeezes through. Greg went first. His death was the hole that broke the dam and brought a flood of change. The waters of change have been unstoppable ever since.
Not every change is bad, but each takes me further from the life I had with Greg. My son has grown, a marvelous change but laced with loss nonetheless. Opportunities have arisen but I've had to navigate them without my life partner. Other changes have hurt. Friends have moved, coworkers have transitioned to other jobs and worst of all, death keeps taking loved ones from this earth. Things that were true in 2020 are a distant memory and today's realities will soon fade into tomorrow's surprises.
I've heard people say that the only thing certain in life is change. I, as someone who craves certainty and security, hate how true that is. But there is One who is unchanging. One I can count on to be steady no matter how much the ground beneath my feet seems to tremble as the waters of change flood past.
Hebrews 13:8 tells me that, "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Oh how much solace this brings my heart.
Welcome or not, change will keep coming. I can't slow time. I can't stop progress. I have no idea what is ahead. But as the flood waters of change continue to storm past, as things and people I love slip through my hands, I can hold on to the unchanging One who will never stop holding on to me.